CHAPTER TEN

August 17, 1998

They're hurting her, these awful, dark, faceless figures. "My baby," Meghann pleads but that only seems to make them angrier. Why do they hate her so much?

"No!" Meghann screams when she sees the glint of steel in the moonlight—a shiny, deadly blade poised at her stomach, ready to murder the innocent child inside her.

But the blade goes through her and Meghann feels blinding pain. Worse, she feels her child dying… she feels its confusion as the nurturing darkness of her womb is invaded by cold steel and the small spark of life inside her is brutally extinguished.

Meghann raises her eyes one more time and sees another cloaked figure far away. His back is turned to her but she knows who it is.

"Simon!" she shouts with the last of her strength. "Don't let us die! Help me!"

Doesn't he hear her? Why does he keep his back turned? Why is he going away?

"Come back!" Meghann yells but her voice is growing weak and her vision is fading. She's dying, along with her baby. "Why are you leaving us? Help me!"

"Simon!" Meghann jerked herself out of the nightmare with one last howl. Wild-eyed and shaking all over, she clutched a pillow to her chest, trying to force herself to breathe regularly.

Just a dream, Meghann told herself. So why did she feel such a sense of oppression and dread that she wanted to scream again?

"Charles?" she called. Hadn't he or Lee heard her scream? Then her eyes fell on the note propped neatly on her bedstead.

Meghann,

Our flight leaves at 8:30. Got a little concerned when you were still sleeping but Lee says expectant mothers need more rest. You've got the cell phone number—call me!

Love,

Charles

Belatedly, Meghann remembered Charles's and Lee's trip to San Francisco for the forty-sixth meeting of the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists where Lee was giving a lecture on management of high-risk pregnancy. They were only going to be gone three days and had asked Meghann to accompany them but she'd insisted they take the trip together. Though Charles had had reservations about leaving her alone, he'd agreed to go—at least until he arrived at Simon's last night and saw what was going on between Meghann and her master.

Charles hadn't said anything to blame her or make her feel ashamed of what she almost did with Simon. Charles's attitude was that Meghann was a victim of the blood link between her and Simon. He insisted she couldn't be held responsible for her actions while she was drinking her master's blood but it was obvious she couldn't be left alone with him. From now on, Charles would remain with her when she had to see Simon to ensure he couldn't take advantage of her.

He'd stay with her while Lee went to San Francisco by himself.

It had been nearly sunrise before Meghann was able to convince Charles that while he meant well, he'd be doing her no favor by treating her like a backward child that had to be supervised. Her feelings toward Lord Baldevar were complex and based on much more than a mere blood link.

"But, Meghann," Charles had shouted. "Can't you see those feelings are ones he's putting in your head? He's making you think you want him when you don't!"

"You don't know that," Meghann had screamed back. "I don't know that… but I want to! I want to understand myself. I want to come to terms with him. Lee's right. I have to examine my feelings—no matter how dismayed I am by my findings."

Charles had given his lover a scathing glance before turning back to Meghann, speaking with a slow, careful enunciation that showed he was on the verge of losing his temper. "Meghann, I'm not going to stand by and watch you give yourself to a monster! You deserve more. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time finding love. If only you were a man so we could fall in love and get married!"

That ridiculous statement had cut the tension in the room with everyone, Lee included, laughing at such an absurdity.

"I could do a hell of a lot worse," Meghann had said, hugging her friend close.

"That's the problem," Charles had replied. "Look, I may not be in love with you but I love you like a sister. Do you think I should stand by and let you ruin your life?"

"Don't you think I know better than to be with Simon?" Meghann had replied. "Look, I want you and Lee to go away together because I need some time by myself. If a part of me wants him—a masochistic, self-destructive part—I have to face it down and cut it out of me, the same way I'd cut a limb off if it got gangrene. I want the next four days to be a time of retreat and meditation. That way I can tell Simon no by myself instead of needing you to stand guard over me so I don't throw myself at him. Can't you see? I need to turn him away by myself."

Charles had examined her closely before he finally sighed and nodded. "I should have known better than to think you'd settle for anything less than rejecting him of your own will—even when it's seriously compromised by having to drink his blood. Okay, we'll go to San Francisco and give you time to yourself. But I saw the blood on you last night. You don't need to feed, so promise me you won't go near him while we're gone."

Meghann had given her promise and Charles had reluctantly agreed to go with Lee to San Francisco.

Now Meghann wished her friend were still here… wished anybody were here. That nightmare had left her with a pounding heart and a driving fear that put her on the edge of panic.

Silly, she told herself. That dream is just a manifestation of your subconscious fears. Part of you wants Simon but another part knows you shouldn't put your faith in him… knows all it would bring you is the pain you felt in that dream. That's all—you're not in any real danger.

So why did Meghann feel as if the walls of the small room were closing in on her? Why was every instinct screaming at her to get out of the house? Run, was the undercurrent in her thoughts. Danger… Danger… Run away!

Simon, Meghann thought and nearly reached for the phone. Not that she needed the mortal appliance—she could simply summon him with the power of her thoughts if she wanted to. Then she wouldn't be alone with this crippling fear. Unlike the dream, he'd never turn her away. She knew he'd meet her, hold her…

No! She'd made a promise to Charles—was she going to break it a scant hour after he left, behave like a frightened child and demand someone pet her fears away? She wouldn't call Simon, she'd do precisely what she was supposed to do while Charles and Lee were gone—use the time to get her head together.

The desert, Meghann thought, and she was pleased to feel the constricting band around her chest loosen a little. Maybe she just needed to get out of the house… needed air and space so she could think.

Meghann showered quickly and pulled her hair into a casual ponytail, throwing on baggy jeans and her Mets jersey. But something still nagged at her, whispered she needed protection.

On impulse, Meghann went to the cardboard boxes stacked by the closet. Spacious though Lee's house was, he didn't have room for all her things so she'd left most of them in storage. She rummaged through the box where she'd stored Jimmy's possessions and soon found what she was looking for—a .357 magnum revolver.

Meghann felt a ridiculous sense of protection at the heavy weight of the weapon in her hand. For God's sake, why would a vampire need a gun to feel safe? Maybe because this was Jimmy's talisman? A .357 had saved him the night that vampire found his family. Jimmy hadn't been able to save his wife or son but three shots from the magnum had paralyzed the vampire long enough for Jimmy to flee the house and get help. After that, even though the thing had disappeared long before Jimmy returned with the cops, he'd kept the gun by his side and never went out without his magnum when the sun went down.

For the first time that night, Meghann smiled—remembering how she and Jimmy had found each other at a dark time in both their lives and helped each other. She had helped him conquer his alcohol dependency by teaching him he was not helpless against the thing that killed his family. Once he started killing vampires during the day he no longer needed to drown his fear with alcohol at night.

For his part, Jimmy helped her control the treacherous blood lust that constantly screamed at her to kill. Whenever she felt angry or frustrated, the blood lust was there, slyly whispering that one kill would make her feel better. Jimmy suggested that perhaps Meghann needed a way—besides sex, absinthe, and cartons of Camels—to relieve tension, and invited her to come along with him for target practice.

Reaching for a box of ammunition, Meghann smiled, remembering that under Jimmy's tutelage she'd become a crack shot within a few weeks. She recalled his astonishment, watching her shoot the magnum with one hand, when a mortal woman of her size and weight would have been knocked off her feet even if she fired with both hands.

Target practice, Meghann decided, and inserted cartridges into the chambers, snapped the cylinder shut, clicked on the safety, and stuffed the gun down the waistband of her jeans. She'd go to the desert and take a few rounds of target practice while she did her best to resolve her feelings.

Meghann drove her Caddy to the spot Simon had taken her to for their picnic. Here she'd made the mistake of letting Simon back into her life so this was the perfect to place to banish him from her heart.

Meghann rummaged through her CD collection, looking for something to suit her angry, confused mood. She stopped at Ace of Spades, thinking the loud, harsh riffs of Motorhead were precisely what this night called out for.

Jimmy had introduced her to Motorhead, Meghann remembered while she set up the empty soda bottles she'd brought along for target practice. Prior to him, she'd had no real interest in British punk rockers, preferring New York-based bands like The Ramones and The Heartbreakers. But Jimmy kept playing their albums and dragging her to concerts until she was won over.

And that, Meghann thought as she shot the bottles in rhythm with the maniacally high-energy songs, was what a relationship was supposed to be… give and take, exchanging thoughts and interests. Jimmy Delacroix and the six years they'd lived together were the closest thing to a normal relationship she'd had since she transformed. No dark, hungry desire that turned you inside out and made it so nothing else in the world mattered… just a sweet, good-humored friendship that also happened to include the best sex she'd ever had aside from Simon Baldevar.

Simon Baldevar, Meghann thought and knocked down a bottle. She wished he'd never come back from the dead and so thoroughly disrupted her life—just when she'd finally found a way to live happily as an immortal.

Damn you, Simon, Meghann thought savagely and blasted a target. Why couldn't you leave me alone?

She reloaded and acknowledged ruefully that Simon Baldevar wouldn't be a problem at all if she could just refuse him and mean it. That fiend had too much pride to chase after a woman truly repulsed by him. So what kept drawing her toward him, making her look forward to seeing him when she should despise him for all he'd done?

Lust? If only it were that simple. If Meghann thought her only feeling toward Simon was physical need, she wouldn't be upset. It was the other feelings, the way he made her feel safe and content, in spite of everything she knew about him.

Meghann leaned against a towering mesa and considered her situation. A year ago, if someone had told her Simon Baldevar could reappear in her life, murder Alcuin, shatter Jimmy's mind, impregnate her, and then make her almost like him in a month's time, Meghann wasn't sure if she'd have laughed at such absurdity or bashed the unfortunate seer's brains in.

So how had he done it? To a degree, Meghann knew the answer. The ruthless, amoral fiend that murdered and destroyed lives with such ease was only one side of his personality… the side Meghann had no trouble resisting. It was the other part of him… the romantic, the endlessly innovative lover and utterly gentle man that could calm her with one tender glance… that was the creature Meghann gave her heart to.

Are you falling in love with him? a voice asked anxiously.

I don't know, Meghann responded.

How can you not know? the voice fired back. You've had forty years to think about it.

Actually, that wasn't true. From the time she had impaled him to the time Alcuin had told her Simon was still alive, Meghann refused to speak or even think of him. Part of that was childish superstition—it seemed that thinking of him might invoke him, somehow bring him back to life.

The rare times she did think of Simon, Meghann soothed herself with one litany—Simon Baldevar was a brutal monster that tore her from her family, forced vampirism on her, and made her live in his gilded cage of sexual bondage and spiritual servitude until deliverance came in the form of Alcuin. With such thoughts running through her mind, it was easy to believe she'd never loved Simon, never felt anything for him but hate, fear, and perhaps the smallest touch of lust…

Danger! Meghann's heart dropped into her stomach and her mouth went dry. There were immortals near her and they meant serious harm to her.

That dream—she'd thought it was symbolic, her ambivalent feelings toward Simon. Now she knew it had been a warning.

Shit! What the hell was she going to do? Meghann took a deep breath, knowing she must keep calm or she was dead. What was her best option?

Astral projection, she decided swiftly. Get the hell away from the threat. Pregnant, Meghann was in no condition to engage in physical combat. Even though she was fifty miles out of town and astral projection would only take her thirty miles, that was all right. She'd just make two trips.

Meghann closed her eyes and concentrated on a lonely stretch of highway thirty miles away… by the railroad tracks… concentrated…

No! Meghann almost screamed the word aloud in her terror, but to do so would bring her attackers closer. What was the matter with her? She'd felt the physical world start to fall away, her body start to drift, and then she'd stopped cold, her body remaining firm and refusing to become incorporeal.

Why? With a sinking heart, Meghann remembered Simon telling her pregnancy might hinder her ability to fly the plane.

Goddammit, those footsteps were too fucking close for her to have any hope of getting to her car and speeding away. And if she'd lost the ability to fly… what the hell was she going to do? Wait—Simon's invisibility trick?

Meghann wrapped the imaginary black blanket around her aura, imagining it as a tight sheath that covered her from head to toe. Thus covered, she began walking toward her car, knowing if she could just get to her car she'd be safe. No vampire could outrun a Caddy.

"Where do you think you're going, bitch?"

Stunned, Meghann whirled around and saw her attackers but first she wondered if her eyes were deceiving her.

"I'm going to my car," Meghann said calmly to Guy Balmont, a dense mass of a vampire, nearly seven feet tall. He'd been Alcuin's right hand until she and Charles came along. She only had a nodding acquaintance with the two men by his side. All she knew of them was that they were both at least two hundred years old… very old and most likely quite powerful. "Why don't you move out of my way?"

"Did you learn arrogance at the knee of your master?" Guy thundered, and Meghann felt serious fright—both at the hatred in his eyes and the broadsword at his waist, a twin to the one both his partners wore. The broadsword—weapon of choice for decapitating an errant vampire. Dear God… the blade in her dream…

"You and your faggot friend," Guy went on, spittle flying from his mouth in his fury. "Thinking yourselves so clever… that you could evade us. But I found you… Charles isn't here to help you, is he, slut? He's in San Francisco, carrying out his own sins against nature with some mortal."

Damn—Charles must have paid for that airline ticket with a credit card. Why had she and Charles forgotten how much the Ballnamore vampires despised them? Why had they thought they needn't bother with safety precautions once Simon found them?

"So you found me," Meghann said coolly. "Tell me what you want and get the fuck away from me."

"Don't act so haughty with me, wench. Your lover is not here to save you from your deserved punishment."

"If you are referring to Lord Baldevar, he is not my lover."

"You carry his bastard," one of Guy's henchmen snarled at her.

How the hell could they know that? She and Charles had been so careful; they hadn't removed any of the archives from Ballnamore and Meghann hadn't allowed any vampires, with their too keen senses, near her. Unless… were some of the vampires at Ballnamore in Charles's bloodline? Maybe his worry for her lowered his shields and made it possible for them to read his thoughts.

Knowing a denial would be futile, Meghann thought she saw another way out of this trap. These vampires were older than she—an advantage but it could be their downfall too. They'd underestimate her because she was a woman. And they couldn't read her thoughts, so if she got them to drop their guard, she might have a chance to get out of this mess alive.

Meghann crouched over, looking as if she were about to cry but actually slipping Jimmy's gun from her waistband. Thank God she'd reloaded it. She spoke, proud of the piteous quiver in her voice. "Don't you call my baby an abomination. This is a child like any other… innocent of its father's sins."

"You dare to compare that thing inside you with an innocent babe? It is the spawn of a whore and a wretched fiend and it is my duty to rip it from your womb before it can destroy us all. The Council knew I was right about you when we learned of your pregnancy. I have their permission to slaughter you for your treachery."

There—she had her finger on the safety catch. Meghann let out a snarl, praying the sound would prevent any of the vampires from hearing her click the safety off. "Is that what all this is about? You fucking hypocrite, don't try and pretend you're saving the world by killing me. You're hoping that Charles will be too grief-stricken when I'm gone to stand in your way. You loathsome, vile bastard! You want the position Alcuin left to me and Charles? Come and take it if you can."

One of Guy's henchmen lunged at her. Meghann's hand lashed up and she put the .357 to his head. When she fired, the vampire flew off his feet, blood and brain matter drenching Guy and the other apprentice.

She felt a violent power yank the gun from her hand but that was fine—she'd expected Guy to do that. While he concentrated on pulling the weapon from her, Meghann turned her attention to the wounded vampire, and his sword flew into her outstretched hand.

Sidestepping the apprentice that tried to grab her, Meghann leaped the short distance to the shot vampire, already managing to sit up and look around in a dazed manner. He saw Meghann land by his side but before he could even bring up his hand, she decapitated him in one swift stroke.

"Grab her, you fool!" she heard Guy bellow, and whirled around to face her other attacker. The vampire raised his sword but Meghann had no intention of engaging in swordplay. Instead she drove her foot through his groin, feeling a grim satisfaction when he fell to his knees, whining from the pain of his crushed testicles.

There… two down, one to go. Meghann knew better than to try and take on Guy. Her plan was to jump to the top of the towering mesa behind her; she could repel attacks up there and maybe leap the distance to her car.

Meghann bent her knees and prepared to lunge but a massive boulder flew at her. She tried to duck but the thing caught the right side of her face, smashing her cheekbone to pulp.

Screaming in pain, she fell to the ground, terrified by the sudden nausea and cramping pain she felt in her abdomen. No, don't let me lose the baby.

Meghann had to concentrate her energy on stopping the miscarriage, healing herself. As Alcuin had taught her to do, she turned her concentration inward… saw the contracting uterus and focused all her power on holding it still. Only after several horrible moments of waiting did the contractions ease and Meghann knew she wouldn't lose her baby.

While Meghann lay curled up and gasping for breath, her attackers pounced. Dimly, she felt rough hands yank her up, tear her clothes off, and tie her to the mesa. Her face had healed, but she still felt nauseated.

Guy's fist smashed into her face, bringing her back to full consciousness. "Still Lord Baldevar's proud, high-stepping whore, aren't you? How fortunate that I found you before he could save you and your devil's spawn."

Dazed, Meghann looked up at him and then she began giggling hysterically.

"Stop that," Guy snarled and twisted her nipples viciously. "Stop that immediately! How can you laugh now?"

"You're a fool!" Meghann yelled, her voice shattering the stillness of the desert. Guy and his apprentice backed away, seeming a little frightened of the bound woman in front of them. "Can't you feel your enemy? He's here, you moron!"

Meghann thought she saw the giant's hands tremble and his apprentice went ashen. "What do you mean, here? He knows of… no!"

"Yes!" Meghann cried, her voice stuffy because Guy had broken her nose and it hadn't healed yet. "He knows I'm pregnant and he's here! Won't it be nice to see your old enemy now that you don't have Alcuin's robes to cower behind, you low-life piece of shit?"

Meghann took a deep breath and transformed her terror into energy she used to send out an urgent message: Help me, Simon! She had no doubt Lord Baldevar would come to her aid; she was pregnant. But she had no idea where he was; he could be too far away to fly here. What if he was too late? How long could she hold Guy off?

Summoning made her sick again; she was dizzy and having trouble breathing. But the other vampires were not a threat to her right now; their heads were ringing from the power behind Meghann's call.

Dazed, Guy pulled himself up and slapped her hard enough to make her head slam into the rock behind her. "You'll be dead before your master arrives, bitch."

She couldn't stand being naked in front of this monster; she felt his muddy eyes roaming over her body and gave him a sneer she hoped masked her fear. "Take a good long look, Guy. You'll never see a naked woman again. Even if you do kill me, we both know Lord Baldevar will slaughter you easily." Guy raised his hand again but Meghann continued taunting him. "Why don't you tell your idiot apprentice that you've never won a confrontation with Lord Baldevar?"

"Shut up!" Guy roared and wrapped his hands around her neck. "I'll kill you, you little whore!"

Her throat was like clay in his huge fingers. Meghann felt them digging into her skin. She saw stars… he was crushing her larynx; she couldn't breathe.

Abruptly, he let her go and Meghann's head fell on her chest as she tried to force air through her wounded throat.

Then she felt a hand wrap itself in her hair, and Guy pulled her up, making sure she saw the sword he held to the fiery mass of hair clenched in his fist. "Lord Baldevar might be strong but I know how to crush him. Tell me, do you think that cold monster might actually cry if he saw his precious whore scalped… her oh so beautiful hair and the top of her skull spread on the floor beside her while the blood of his bastard offspring flows down her legs? Prepare to meet your maker."

Meghann saw murder in his eyes, murder and no hope a plea might reach his hate-filled, enraged mind. And Simon wasn't here. Who was going to save her baby? She couldn't let this thing kill her.

Guy raised his sword and Meghann saw the sharp tip coming at her abdomen.

"Azazeal!" she screamed in her panic. Dimly, she remembered Simon's story of that demon he had summoned to kill his father. She couldn't remember the name of the devil he'd summoned but she had taken a look at that leather-bound copy of the Lemegeton he kept in his study. Heedless of the consequences, Meghann yelled out one of the most powerful conjurations of the Key of Solomon in the moment Guy's sword grazed her belly.

"I conjure you, evil and rebellious spirit, that abides in Abyss of Darkness! Come to me, come to me, Angel of Darkness, and stand ready to do as I command thee!"

The mesa she was tied to exploded into a thousand pieces of rock and Meghann flew a good twelve feet. Dazed, she pulled herself to her feet and recoiled at the foul odor permeating the air.

"My God," she whispered reverentially when she saw Guy's henchman torn apart by an unseen force. Arms and legs were torn away as if they were mere match-sticks and then the decapitated limbs attacked the vampire's torso. Over it all, Meghann heard the same maniacal cackling that had nearly driven her mad the night Simon summoned, when he'd been so infuriated because she tried to kill him and save Jimmy. In a moment of rage, he'd conjured monsters even he had trouble controlling.

No, Meghann thought in horror. I couldn't have called those things—no! If they'd been almost too powerful for Simon to control, she had no prayer of holding them in her thrall. A minor demon, that's what she'd tried for… not this unholy force that was moving toward her…

Meghann spun around, and cowered within the small circle that appeared. Please let the circle protect her, please…

She saw something hover at the edge of the circle and breathed a small sigh of relief that quickly became a scream when it plucked her off the ground and shook her like a rag doll.

She waited for it to tear out her limbs and then realized her fate was going to be far worse. The thing was trying to get inside her… she felt its freezing form try to crawl into her. It wanted her body whole… it panted at the chance to possess a vampire's body.

Meghann fought with every ounce of her being and her effort only wound up being a slight nudge. She almost felt the thing's amusement at her struggles. It knew she'd weaken before long and it would be able to stay on earth indefinitely; for her immortal form could withstand the shock of possession, she wouldn't erode and die like a possessed human…

"Aufuge a ea!" Meghann heard a voice roar and she was unceremoniously dropped to the ground.

"What… hey…" was all she got out before Simon Baldevar grabbed her up.

"The License to Depart," he said quickly. "Meghann, you called this thing… you must make it leave." He put his hands on both sides of her forehead. "Concentrate, Meghann. Take my strength within you and use it to cast this thing back to hell."

Meghann felt something dark and infinitely potent surge through her body, its impact that of a jolt of electricity. This was her master's power flowing through her, and it alone could save her now.

As Meghann glared at the thing before her, her voice held the coldness and lack of fear that would intimidate the thing into obeying her. "Disobedient spirit, I deprive you off all office and dignity if you do not immediately depart unto your abode!"

The change in the atmosphere was immediate. The indescribable stench vanished and the desert returned to its balmy temperature.

Meghann's eyes darted around, wondering if the demon had destroyed her enemies. She saw the dismembered carcass of one vampire and of course there was the one she had killed, but where was Guy?

"Here." Simon stripped his shirt off and put it on her, buttoning it when Meghann's hands shook too hard to do it herself. "That rabble won't look on you anymore. Now, have they harmed you?"

"I almost lost the baby," Meghann said. "That's when they tied me up… when I was trying to heal my body… they ripped my clothes and tied me up… naked. Oh, God, I can't stand the way he looked at me and I thought I was going to die. I thought I'd die here in the desert… tied up and powerless to keep them from hurting the baby…"

"Cry, Meghann," Simon said when she fell into his arms, sobbing as though she would never stop. "Cry and get that horrible fear out of you. Cry for all that wretch did to you in an attempt to hurt me. No one will ever harm you again, I promise."

"Guy…"

"That coward will show himself soon and this harrowing night will be over." Meghann noticed Simon was clutching the sword she'd stolen from one of the vampires.

"I dreamed of you tonight," she choked out. "They were… kill… killing me but you kept your back turned, you wouldn't help…"

"Hush," Simon said and his arms tightened around her until she thought he'd crush her but she didn't mind. She clung just as tightly to him. "Meghann, listen to me. Don't you ever, ever summon from the Lemegeton again. I know Guy terrified you but that magick is not for you. Do you know I barely got here in time to help you repulse that thing? Guy and his minions I could certainly dispatch but you cannot summon things you don't know how to control. It could destroy your body if not render you as mindless as Jimmy Delacroix. Understand?"

Meghann started to nod, but Simon's expression changed, eyes becoming fierce and hard as one arm reached out and Meghann was shoved away from him.

"Don't interfere," Simon ordered and then addressed Guy, standing before him and holding his sword in the classic attack position. "Father Balmont, are you sure you wish to spar with me? I am not a pregnant, defenseless female and you no longer have two strong brutes at your side."

"I'm not afraid to face you," Guy snarled and lunged at him but Simon easily deflected the blow while getting in his own thrust at Guy's forearm.

Meghann watched the fight… she'd never seen Simon Baldevar with a sword in his hand. He must have been a deadly opponent in his time, Meghann thought, watching him force the giant of a vampire back with a series of whirling slashes and ripostes. He moved so fast he was almost a blur to Meghann's eyes… a blur that moved against his enemy with a lethal, vicious speed and grace.

"I'll make you watch me kill your whore," Guy panted, just managing to block Simon's sword before it attacked his heart.

Simon's response was a sharp thrust at Guy's throat The other vampire deflected him and tried to push his weight down on Simon's blade to make him drop his sword.

If Guy thought his solid mass was a match for Lord Baldevar, he was sadly mistaken. Small beads of perspiration appeared on his forehead as he pressed down on the sword with all his weight and that's when Simon allowed his sword to go completely lax. Unable to adjust himself to the abrupt release of tension, Guy felt his momentum carry his arm down to the ground and from there it was a simple matter for Simon to stab the hunched-over vampire in the back to puncture his heart.

Simon glared down at his dying enemy for a moment before lifting his eyes to search for Meghann. He saw her hunched over a pile of rocks, frantically pawing through the stones.

"My father's ring!" she screamed up at him when he touched her shoulder. "That… that cocksucker, he must have ripped it off my neck!" Meghann clawed at the rubble, not seeming to notice her long nails breaking as she tore the ground apart.

"I can't lose my father's ring," Meghann sobbed. "His wedding ring… my brother Frankie gave it to me… after I left you, I visited my family before I went to Alcuin. And Frankie said Daddy wanted me to have the ring… I was supposed to give it to my husband. I wear it around my neck, to keep it near me. But now it's not here… I can't find it! I can't lose it, I can't!"

"Meghann." Simon spoke in a low, gentle voice, rocking her back and forth as though she were a small child. "It's all right… no, don't cry. We'll find the ring, I promise. Hush now, hush."

Meghann clung to him, feeling lulled by the steady beat of his heart and the broad, comforting chest that pillowed her head.

"Now," Simon said, the calmness of his voice pushing her panic back. "Where were you when Guy took your ring?"

"It was after they tied me to the mesa. I felt the chain come off my neck but the mesa doesn't exist now. It blew up when I… when I called that thing. So I was looking through the debris…"

"Do you remember where the mesa was?"

Meghann nodded and pointed to a large boulder a few feet from them.

"Let's start our search there." Simon helped her up, and kept one arm around her waist as they walked to the spot where the mesa had stood.

Immediately, Simon spied a small gleam of gold under the largest piece of stone and plucked up the ring. "Here you are, sweetheart." He deposited the ring in the breast pocket of the shirt he'd put on Meghann.

Instead of smiling, she looked up at him with somber eyes. She felt the solid-gold band through the thin fabric of the linen shirt and thought of how excited she'd been the night Frankie gave her the ring, the night she thought she'd killed Simon and visited the family she hadn't been near since she had transformed.

The wedding ring was Meghann's talisman, something she'd gained by leaving Simon to die and making peace with the family he'd kept her from. The ring was proof she was the independent, fearless woman her father had raised her to be, not the simpering little creature that obeyed Lord Baldevar's every whim.

Now that wretched Guy Balmont had forced her into a position where she had to depend on Simon for her life. Damn him, Meghann thought, feeling almost strangled by the anger and frustration inside her. She'd sought sanctuary with Alcuin to be free of Simon, and now Guy had pushed her right back into his arms…

"What crisis made you cling to me last night?" Simon asked softly though his gold eyes burned through the pitch-black surrounding them.

Meghann started to speak and he grabbed her close, gripping her forearms in an iron vise that made her cry out.

"You're mine," Simon said fiercely. "Why does that simple truth make you writhe in embarrassment? What will it take to make you realize you belong to me?"

Before she could respond, Simon kissed her—no gentle caress like he'd given her the night before but a hard, possessive touch that unleashed a wild, primal desire inside her.

I want you, Meghann—body and soul. Surrender to me!

"Yes," she heard herself pant, everything save the tempestuous, dominating force tearing through her forgotten. "Please take me!"

Whore!

"Guy," Meghann cried and sat up. "I thought he was dead!"

"If I did not have ample reason before to kill him, I most certainly do now," Simon growled and gave a mock scowl at Meghann's giggle. He smiled and pulled her close for one more kiss before getting up and giving her his hand. "Wait by the car, and I shall destroy him. Then, we shall pick up where we were before that knave interrupted us."

Meghann shook her head. "It's my place to kill him, not yours."

Simon laughed, and folded her arm through his. "More and more, you are proving yourself my consort. Certainly yours should be the hand to wield the executioner's ax. Come along, sweetheart."

The impaled vampire sprawled facedown on the rocky desert floor, gasping for breath and squirming miserably with the sword securely lodged through his chest.

Simon gave Guy a chilling grin and grabbed his arm, tearing into his carotid artery with his blood teeth.

Meghann had to turn away… watching Simon feed was making her own blood lust rise. She glanced up at the full moon, thinking that instead of her finding answers, this trip out to the desert had resulted in more questions.

Something was happening between her and Simon, had been since the night she conceived. She'd been so sure, when Alcuin first told her Lord Baldevar was still alive, that he'd want to kill her. Instead, he'd declared himself still in love with her and laughingly told her she reciprocated his feelings, even if she denied it.

Meghann had denied it—vehemently and often. Hadn't she spent forty years of her life reviling him, thanking God she was free of him? Then he reappeared and it was almost as if they'd never been apart. But why? It wasn't as if time had mellowed him—he was still the same amoral fiend that took what he wanted with no regard for anyone else.

May God forgive you for embracing a monster.

"Shut up!" Meghann howled out loud, startling Simon out of feeding. She yanked the sword out of Guy's body and used it to castrate him with one swift stroke. "Don't you call him a monster, you… you baby killer!"

Meghann brandished the sword high above her head, about to bring it down on Guy's neck, when he whimpered, "I have failed my master."

"What the hell are you talking about?" she demanded. "Alcuin would despise you for what you tried to do tonight."

"It's…" he tried to gasp out, "it's you he would despise now… Baldevar's slut…" Hemorrhaging from his mouth and nose, Guy was unable to continue speaking.

"Weakling," Simon muttered and put his hand on Guy's lank hair, allowing a small spark of life to flow through the dying vampire… just enough so he could finish his last words.

Meghann felt her heart plummet into her stomach at the eager, interested look on Simon's face. If he gave Guy a reprieve, then she was sure she didn't want to hear what he was about to say.

Guy managed to smile at her… the grin a hideous contrast to the pain in his eyes. "He made you his favorite to trick you… make you trust him. Alcuin didn't love you… just wanted to keep you away from your master. Told me… told me to deal with you… kill you if you ever conceived Lord Baldevar's child."

"You lying motherfucker!" Meghann swung the sword at Guy's neck, decapitating him in the blink of an eye. After he was dead, she continued to hack at his flesh, swinging blindly. "Die! Die! Die! Die!"

She howled and thrashed when Simon pinioned her arms to her sides and took the sword from her. "Let go of me!"

"Your hysteria could harm the child," he said calmly.

"It's not true! It's not!" Meghann cried. "Alcuin loved me, I know he did."

Simon turned her around and caressed her cheek. "Perhaps he was fond of you as long as you remained pious and frigid toward me. However, if he ever thought you were falling in love with me again, he would have sanctioned your death without a second thought."

Meghann choked out the word "no" but it was a desperate plea instead of a furious denial.

"Meghann, he knew the implications of you reuniting with me, and I'd wager my immortality that he never once discussed them with you. You are carrying a child that might release us from darkness. If he lives, someday his blood might give us the power to walk in daylight. If I possess such power, what will stop me from destroying everyone that stands in my way?"

Suddenly, Meghann saw it—a ruthless vampire who didn't have to sleep during the day. The rest of the vampires would be completely vulnerable to him; he'd kill them while the sun was up.

"That's right, Meghann. Alcuin knew he'd have to either keep us apart or destroy you."

"Stop saying that!" Meghann yelled. "Alcuin wouldn't kill me, never!"

"Wouldn't he? I killed him before making you pregnant to keep you safe. After you conceived, if you had managed to leave me again, do you know what he would have done?" Simon's bleak grin frightened Meghann more than Guy's surprise attack. "Nothing. He would have kept us separated so I could not nourish you with my blood—just stood over your deathbed and watched you starve to death."

Meghann put her hands to her ears; she could not bear to hear any more of this. It was making the past forty years of her life a lie. Simon took her hands in his, breaking her heart as well as her faith in Alcuin with his words.

"What do you think, Meghann? That Alcuin would tell you to seek me out so I could save you? He kept you in the dark because he never fully trusted you or your good friend, Doctor Tarleton." Simon's lips curled derisively at her shocked look. "Meghann, I'm not spinning this tale of betrayal to convince you that you have no friends and make you turn to me for solace; I have no desire to win you by default. I simply want you to face some hard truths. Do you think Charles Tarleton would still be alive if I thought he wanted to kill you? No, Alcuin could see that you and Charles gave your first loyalty to each other so he lied to you both."

"Maybe he didn't know I had to drink your blood," Meghann cried, finding a straw to grasp at.

Simon laughed nastily. "Dear girl, do you know how Infans Noctis came into my possession? Isaac Spears stole it from Alcuin. He knew that secret long before I ever did."

Meghann didn't know it was possible to hurt like this; there was a bitter lump in her throat and a tightness in her chest that made it difficult to breathe. She took air in short, shallow gasps, willing herself not to cry. She would not cry over this… she would not cry over being betrayed by Alcuin, over the idea that all his loving guidance that reminded her so much of her mortal father turned out to be no more than a means to an end for him, a way to keep her and Lord Baldevar apart.

Meghann looked at the hellish scene around her—Guy Balmont's head glaring up at her, the eyes open and accusing, the dismembered corpse of his apprentice, all the rocks from the shattered mesa—and thought she had to get away from this cursed spot. She had to get in her car and drive far, far from this place where she nearly lost her child. If she never saw the desert again, it would be too soon. She started to walk, idly wondering if Simon would make any move to detain her. Right now she couldn't even look at him. How he must be laughing at her, a silly fool that couldn't even see she was being manipulated, that Alcuin only took her in to keep her from him.

Feeling dizzy and sick, she sagged against the Caddy, utterly drained and incapable of taking another step, even the small one of opening the car door. The world spun away from her and she would have slumped to the ground if not for the strong arms that picked her up and tossed her onto the front seat of the car.

Feed and you'll feel better. A wrist appeared under her mouth, and her nose twitched at the inviting smell of strong, hot blood.

Hungrily, Meghann bit down, feeling nothing but relief when the sweet taste of blood filled her mouth and banished her sickness. She lapped up the blood greedily, devouring not just the liquid but the power and strength flowing into her body from Simon's blood, wanting all that vigor for herself and the baby.

"Enough," she heard an amused voice say and the wrist was yanked away from her blood teeth and grasping hands. She became aware that her head was resting on Simon's lap, and tried to move but he kept her in place. "You must wait until you can feed on mortals again to drain your prey completely, little predator."

"Simon?" she murmured drowsily. "Is there something wrong with me? Why am I so tired?"

"Nothing is wrong," he responded calmly. "Nothing but being pregnant and utterly exhausted from that wretched attack. Sleep now, little one, and I promise you'll feel better when you wake up tomorrow night."

"Why didn't you kill me?" she said and twisted around to make herself more comfortable. Meghann knew her questions had some sense of urgency behind them but it was getting so hard to think or speak.

"What?"

"When you came back." She yawned. "Why didn't you just kill me?… ran off and left you to die… ruined our life together for nothing just so one of your enemies could… could use me against… you. Why don't you hate me?"

"Hate you? For what? Being young and vulnerable to the machinations of a duplicitous priest? Don't upset yourself by dwelling on the past. Just shut your eyes and get the sleep you need to recover."

"Where are we going?" she managed to slur out when she heard the Caddy roar to life. "I… Don't take me back to Lee's… scared to be alone…"

"Hush," Simon told her and stroked her hair, lulling her into sleep. "I am taking you where you belong… home with me."

"Good," Meghann said and closed her eyes. She could sleep now, knowing that Simon Baldevar was standing guard over her and her baby.